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Showing posts from July, 2015

The "Stages" of Grief

When going through life, a Type A personality like me, likes things mapped out. God, in His oh so funny sense of humour, created life to be much more exciting than a neatly mapped out beginning, middle and end.

Isn't this list of stages nice and neat?


The thing is, when grieving, you don't go through each stage one after the other. You experience one, skip another, come back to a stage you've already experienced. And sometimes I find that I go through every single one of these stages in the course of a day. It's exhausting.

Recently someone brought the following curve of the stages of grief forward to me. It makes so much sense to me:


Although I bounce around in many of these areas, it feels like I am bouncing around the bottom of this curve these days.

Disorganization. This is driving me crazy. I can't think straight. I forget stuff. All. The. Time. The other day I missed the turn off to our home and only figured it out 10 minutes later. This is soooo not like me…

The worst kind of homesickness

Have you ever been homesick? Missed home, or someone you love so deeply that it hurts? You ache to be home or with that person?

I have been homesick for my family, my childhood home, my husband...

None of it compares to the homesickness that comes with grief.

Today it hits hard.

Today marks six months since Mikail went home to heaven, and I've come to the conclusion that missing him is the worst kind of homesickness I have ever experienced. The lure of heaven has never been sweeter.

Six months. That's half a year. In that time winter turned to spring, and spring into summer. Changes have happened all around us and when I think that six months have passed by, I can hardly believe it. The months have flown by, but oh how the days drag on and on and on. How can it be that the days are long but the months are short?

We miss you beyond belief, buddy! We are thankful for the bits of beauty that come along to comfort us at the perfect times. Lately it has been beautiful dragonflies l…

I will not be shaken

Sometimes the storms of life are too much to take. In the past year we have had more storms than just the obvious one of Mikail passing away. And it's hard. Sometimes it feels like it is just too much. I read scriptures like the ones below and I believe them. I do.

When the storm has swept by, the wicked are gone, but the righteous stand firm forever. ~ Proverbs 10:25~ So, my dear brothers, since future victory is sure, be strong and steady, always abounding in the Lord's work, for you know that nothing you do for the Lord is even wasted as it would be if there were no resurrection. ~1 Corinthians 15:58~ I keep my eyes always on the Lord, with Him at my right hand, I will not be shaken.  ~ Psalm 16:8~ Truly, He is my rock and salvation. He is my fortress, I will not be shaken. ~Psalm 62:6~
Good ones, huh? And I believe them. I honestly do, but there are days, like today, where I know I believe these words, but I am weary. I am ready for some of our storms to pass and for a rainbow …